PRE SCHOOL SITES THAT ARE WORTH VISITING

So I have taken initiative to teach my son as much as possible before he goes to school instead of planting him infront of the TV. Here are some sites with fun activities that you can use or print for your kiddie.

Everything preschool
I X L
Starachievers
A to Z kidsstuff

The best one yet is the following one because do you remember how we use to learn to write the alphabet with dots etc? Well they have activities like that and even better they have christian activities.

First-School

3 - 4 YEAR OLD MILESTONES

3- to 4-Year-Old Development: Language Milestones

If your child is not very talkative, that will likely change soon. At  3 to 4 years old, your child should be able to: 

• Say his or her name and age
• Speak 250 to 500 words
• Answer simple questions
• Speak in sentences of five to six words, and speak in complete sentences by age 4
• Speak clearly
• Tell stories

3- to 4-Year-Old Development: Cognitive Milestones

Your child will start asking lots and lots of questions. "Why is the sky blue? Why do birds have feathers?" Questions, questions, and more questions! While it may be annoying at times, asking questions is a normal developmental milestone. In addition to asking "why?" all the time, your 3- to 4-year-old should be able to: 

• Correctly name familiar colors
• Understand the idea of same and different
• Pretend and fantasize more creatively
• Follow three-part commands
• Remember parts of a story
• Understand time better (for example, morning, afternoon, night)
• Count, and understand the concept of counting
• Sort objects by shape and color
• Complete age-appropriate puzzles
• Recognize and identify common objects and pictures

3- to 4-Year-Old Development: Movement Milestones

Your busy preschooler continues to be on the move. At 3  to 4 years old, your child should be able to: 

• Walk up and down stairs, alternating feet -- one foot per step
• Kick, throw, and catch a ball
• Climb well
• Run more confidently and ride a tricycle
• Hop and stand on one foot for up to five seconds
• Walk forward and backwards easily
• Bend over without falling

3- to 4-Year-Old Development: Hand and Finger Skills

Your child is becoming much more nimble. At this point in his or her development, your child should be able to:  

• More easily handle small objects and turn a page in a book
• Use age-appropriate scissors
• Copy circles and squares
• Draw a person with two to four body parts
• Write some capital letters
• Build a tower with nine or more blocks
• Dress and undress without your help
• Screw and unscrew jar lids
• Turn rotating handles

3- to 4-Year-Old Development: Emotional and Social Milestones

Your 3- to 4-year-old is not only becoming more independent physically, but also emotionally. You may start to notice fewer tantrums when you leave your child with a sitter or at preschool.

read more at http://www.webmd.com/parenting/guide/3-to-4-year-old-milestones

TEACHING MY 3 YEAR OLD COLOURS

So apparently there is this new thing that children have to attend preschool before they can go to school. I am all for it but I am noticing that my 3 year old does not know his numbers or colours and is nowhere near ready to write his own name and he is turning 4 soon. I bought books at the toy factory to help him learn but I am wondering if it is even helping because he wants to play not sit and learn. So now I am googling LOL. Any tips? Leave a comment please!

WHAT 35 WEEKS FEEL LIKE

35 WEEKS, WOW

I am officially over this. So I would like to explain to everybody what 35 weeks feel like. I think my baby has dropped. I have purple vertical stretchmarks above my bikini line and when i move too fast I get muscle spasms in the crease between my hoohah and leg. heartburn is at its worst - more than 6 rennie's a day already. My mother had to shave my legs, did I mention that yet? 

MY CAMP AT HOSPITAL

So when I had my son I felt very unprepared so this time I am packed as if I am moving into Louis Leipoldt or camp. Les Stroud, Survivorman, has nothing on me!

 

Wanna know what is in my bag? Here's a sneak peek...

 

Lip balm, socks, pregnancy and baby magazines, 2 pyjamas, 1 nigh gown, old slipper because you bleed into them (TIP), Bra's, Set of clothes for discharge they'll hopefully match the shoes I went in with because I took my boots out my bag, Shampoo, conditioner, brush, make-up, base, razor, soap, cloth, toothbrush, toothpaste, hair elastics, hair clips, nail clipper, nail polish.

 

My ID documents etc, 7 Sets of baby clothes all packed into bundles so I don't lose the socks and tied it with a ribbon, 2 warm blankets, 1 receiving blanket, ear buds, plastic bags, newborn nappies, maternity panties x2, baby wipes, Vaseline, surgical spirits, sweet oil, cotton wool, cleansing lotion, moisturiser, maternity pads, more cloths, towels, timmee toppee bottles, pigeon manual breast pump, soother.

 

Camera and cellphone charger must be put in last.

 

I had 3 bags but now I only have 1 huge TomTom camping bag and a baby bag which I bought pink hoping for a girl but I am having another boy. I'm sure I am forgetting to mention some of the other things but I will update as I go along and remember. PREGNESIA. ***UPDATE*** I packed a secret slimmer and another tuck in product in my bag for after birth, I'm 24 I have to look hot after having a second child.

HOW BIZARRE

So I logged into my email account the other day and guess what someone was trying to hack my account from Puerto Rico. Strange thing is that they weren't trying to do it from the source of my email account but another application. I don't have any state secrets and I don't work for the FBI and the account was only used for my pregnancy newsletters lol all my spam goes there and if I order samples from places to get free stuff. How silly would the hacker not feel if he got into it LOL. I would've sent him/her an email saying " YOU CAN GET YOUR OWN PREGNANCY NEWSLETTERS FOR FREE YOU KNOW LOL"

 

 

MY 3RD TRIMESTER NIGGLES

The end is in sight and oh my gosh it could not have come sooner. Migraines, thrush, heartburn and kicks in my side have consumed my life. We went to the flea market today and we got my pregnancy magazines. Living and loving has been my reliable source since I was pregnant with Corbynne. My mom use to buy every months issue. Magazines are getting so expensive, almost R30! I know internet is faster and there's more to read but there is nothing that can beat a real-life magazine, the touch of pages and the smell of a new book.  Funny enough (I hate change) I bought a Mama's and Papa's magazine. Like I said I don't like change but I must admit it's kind of refreshing to read a new magazine and it's very interesting. I read up on thrush and how it can affect the baby but I am a bit confused and have a few questions to ask my gynae. Thrush sound like it can have the same symptoms as group b strep in a baby. I have a choice, either Google or wait for my gynae. Guess which route I am going... BOTH!

 

Will thrush affect my baby?

No. Your baby is safely sealed inside your uterus (womb) and won't be affected at all. If you have an infection when you go into labour, there is a small chance that your baby will catch it as he passes through your vagina on his way into the world. If your newborn baby has thrush you'll see white patches in his mouth. If you're breastfeeding, both you and your baby will need treatment because thrush can spread to your breasts, too.

You may find thrush comes and goes while you're pregnant. Although may take a while to clear up and be a bit of a nuisance, it isn't anything to worry about.

And Tuesday I will be asking Dr Wipplinger as well.

 

I have realized that I am craving coffee more and more this trimester and that no matter how many sugars I throw in my coffee it is just not sweet enough. I have about 9 cups of coffee a day at minimum.

 

Effects of Caffeine on Your Baby
Caffeine is thought to pose certain risks during pregnancy. Though researchers debate how much caffeine is acceptable during pregnancy, there is evidence to suggest than any amount will cause some physical effects on your little one. This is because caffeine passes through your placenta and is absorbed by your baby. Adults are able to break down caffeine fairly quickly, thanks to chemicals inside of our body. However, your developing baby can't do this as efficiently. This means that caffeine will be stored inside of his blood for longer periods of time, and could reach dangerously high levels.
Caffeine also affects other aspects of your baby's health. It is known to increase your baby's heart rate and may affect how much he moves in utero. Because caffeine is a diuretic, it can also affect the nutrition your baby receives from you. Caffeine intake may cause you to absorb less iron and calcium from foods, a possible detriment to your baby's overall fetal development.

SITES WORTH VISITING

Do you want to try new samples or products? Try these:
Home Testers Club and Save the Date

While I was in school I volunteered at Tygerbear unit at Tygerberg Hospital. I was thinking of volunteering again but thought I'd share the website with you to raise awareness.

www.mominventors.com
www.thenannynotebook.com

Free T-Shirt - sample fashion

Free T-Shirt - sample fashion

I'VE GOT ONE OF THE GOOD ONES

I am in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy and honestly I wouldn't be able to do this without my boyfriend. During the week I am by my parents and weekends I visit my boyfriend (hopefully we get a house soon). When I come to him weekends it is a huge relief. He disciplines our toddler, makes him food, pours him cooldrink and even lets me sleep when our toddler cries for someone to come lay in bed with him. I am so amazed at how amazing this man is during my pregnancy. He is so supportive and helpful. I go on BabyCentre a lot and I love reading the VENTS-posts and not everybody has a great guy like me, no offence since most of my traffic are from my fellow-BC-moms.

 

BABY BOY NAMES

So here I am sitting... I am wondering... what am I gonna call our baby boy. Daddy says Jacob and I've been thinking Zane. Jacob is a nice name but it makes me think of our president, Jacob Zuma and let's face it - he doesn't have the worlds best reputation. Are we ever going to decide?

 

I updated my post called FREE SAMPLES, yes fellow South African's - I got more products from places.

PREGNANCY JOKES THAT ARE SO TRUE

WHAT A BLESSING TO HAVE HIM

My painful contractions have subsided, hospital is booked and awaiting my 2nd gynae appointment plus baby is still in tact. My boyfriend has been an absolute blessing and I am so grateful about how supportive he has been with both my pregnancies. I repacked my hospital bag from 3 small bags to one big bag so at least it won't look like I am planning to move into Louis Leipoldt. Human rights day meant a "kind of" long weekend and we spent it together. Oh how I love this man! He bumped into his manager or something at one of their stores and eish I couldn't hide my big whale body but she at least told him I'm pretty :) but it doesn't matter because he thought that anyway otherwise he wouldn't be with me LOL. I am becoming increasingly uncomfortable and in a selfish way I wish it was time to pop and have a real, live, actual baby. Baby's all elbows and knees. Sleeping is becoming horrible and I am awake every few hours and so tired the next day. Karin and I made a joke and I told her that we are getting too old to have babies (24). I miss my friend so much and even though she comes to visit from Worcester every now and then I wish she was here in Cape Town. I am not even interested in getting other friends because nobody will be like Karin :(

Last night Karin and I were chatting and she said she can't wait to see what our babies look like. All I was thinking is "I can't wait to see what I look like after he is born". I found a few funny pictures overall on the internet and thought I'd share it with you guys since most of my traffic does come from BabyCentre. An extra note for my sweet wonderful boyfriend who has put up with my hormones... I love you more than words can describe (yes, I know you check out my site LOL you're the only other South African)

AS MY WEEKS PROGRESS

So here's why I have been so quiet. Between fighting with a medical aid, them refusing to take my sons grommets out and finding blood and infection in my urine and maybe having my baby before the time and being told he is going to have health issues... I have been having contractions and can't do anything.

 

Update: 24 March 2013

 

Still having some pain. I have been reading up on Braxton hicks and thought that any other momma's might ant to have a read as well.

 

What are Braxton Hicks contractions?

Some time towards the middle of your pregnancy, or maybe even earlier, you may notice the muscles of your uterus (womb) tightening. If you place your hands on your bare bump when this is happening, you can feel how hard your uterus becomes.

Each tightening usually lasts for about half a minute, and probably won't cause you any discomfort. You may have this sensation once or twice an hour, a few times a day (Cheng and Caughey 2009). Not all of us feel these contractions. They get their name from John Braxton Hicks, the English doctor who first described them in 1872.

You may be aware of Braxton Hicks contractions from as early as 16 weeks (Shepherd et al 2004:238). However, without you realising, your uterus has been contracting gently on and off since about seven weeks (Murray and Hassall 2009:191). The bigger your uterus gets, the more you notice the tightening sensations when they happen.

What do Braxton Hicks contractions do?

Braxton Hicks contractions may just be a sign that your uterus is keeping its muscle fibres toned. It could be that these contractions keep your uterus in good condition and ready for the rigours of labour.

Some experts think the contractions also affect your cervix. In early labour

, your cervix starts to get shorter and more stretchy (Walsh 2004:430), ready to dilate and make way for your baby. It's possible that Braxton Hicks contractions give your cervix a bit of a rehearsal for the stretching stage.

Other experts think that Braxton Hicks contractions don't affect your cervix. They believe that your cervix doesn't change until the very last days of your pregnancy (Murray and Hassall 2009:192; Baker 2006:53), or once you're in labour itself (Cheng and Caughey 2009).

What's the difference between Braxton Hicks and labour contractions?

Most women who are pregnant for the first time will ask their midwives or friends this question. The answer is often maddeningly vague, along the lines of: "You'll know real labour when it starts." Fortunately, there are differences between Braxton Hicks contractions and labour contractions

that can help you tell them apart.

Braxton Hicks contractions:

• are infrequent, usually happening no more than once or twice an hour, a few times a day
• often stop if you change activity, so, walk around if you've been sitting, and vice versa
• are usually irregular, and if they are regular they only stay that way for a short spell (McCormick 2009:466)
• do not last long, usually less than a minute (McCormick 2009:466)
• continue to be unpredictable and non-rhythmic
• do not increase in intensity
(Cheng and Caughey 2009)

Compared to Braxton Hicks contractions, labour contractions are usually:

• noticeably longer
• more regular
• more frequent
• more painful
• keep on going, increasing in frequency, duration, and intensity as time goes on
(Cheng and Caughey 2009)

You may experience what is called false labour. This is when Braxton Hicks contractions come more rhythmically, perhaps every 10 to 20 minutes in late pregnancy (Murray and Hassall 2009:191).

False labour can be hard to tell apart from early labour, particularly if the tightening of your uterus feels uncomfortable. However, during false labour your cervix won't have started to change yet (Murray and Hassall 2009:191). Your midwife will be able to tell by carrying out a vaginal examination.

What if the Braxton Hicks contractions become painful?

As your pregnancy progresses, these contractions may become more intense and even painful at times (McCormick 2009:466). When this happens, they may feel like the real thing. But however strong they feel at the time, if they ease off, they are probably Braxton Hicks.

You may find it helpful to think of Braxton Hicks as practice contractions you can use to rehearse the breathing exercises you'll learn in your antenatal class.

You may notice that Braxton Hicks contractions come more often when you do even light activity, such as carrying the shopping. If you feel discomfort, it sometimes helps to lie down, or, conversely, to get up and take a walk. It's the change in activity that can help to ease pain (Cheng and Caughey 2009). A warm bath

sometimes helps, too.

When should I call my doctor or midwife?

If you are less than 37 weeks pregnant, call your doctor or midwife if your contractions are accompanied by:

• watery discharge or bloody vaginal discharge
• lower back pain or cramping

These are signs that you may be going into premature labour

(Baker 2006:173).

After 37 weeks, call your doctor or midwife if:

• you think your baby's movements have slowed down
• you think your waters have broken
• you have any bleeding

Check out other pregnancy symptoms you should never ignore.

If your contractions become longer, stronger, more regular and more frequent then your labour may be starting. Your midwife will probably have talked to you about what to do when you think labour has started, but if you're in any doubt give her or the hospital delivery suite a call.

PUSH GIFT FOR MOMMA PLEASE

Push present

             

A push present (also known as a push gift, baby mama gift or baby bauble) is a present a partner gives to the mother to mark the occasion of her giving birth to their child. In practice the present may be given before or after the birth, or even in the delivery room. The giving of push presents has supposedly grown in the United States in recent years. ^[1] A push gift is any type of present loved ones give to a woman who has recently given birth to a child.^[2] The name push gift although indicative of a vaginal delivery does not exclude those women who have given birth through a C-section.

History

The tradition of gift-giving to commemorate a birth has long roots in England and India.^[3] The term push present first appeared in a publication in 1992.^[4]

There is no conclusive evidence that the present was invented by the jewelry industry to sell more goods,^[1] and until recently it was passed on largely by word of mouth or peer pressure among both mothers and fathers.^[3] According to Linda Murray, the executive editor of BabyCenter, "It’s more and more an expectation of moms these days that they deserve something for bearing the burden for nine months, getting sick, ruining their body. The guilt really gets piled on."^[1] Other sources trace the development of the present to the increased assertiveness of women, allowing them to ask for a present more directly, or the increased involvement of the men in pregnancy, making them more informed of the pain and difficulties of pregnancy and labor.^[1]

Frequency

A 2007 survey of over 30,000 respondents by BabyCenter found that 38% of new mothers received a push present, and 55% of pregnant mothers wanted one, though fewer thought it was actually expected. About 40% of both groups said the baby itself was already a present and did not wish an additional reward.^[1]

The popularity of push presents has been attributed in part to media coverage of celebrities receiving them. Examples include a 10 carat diamond ring given to celebrity stylist Rachel Zoe by her husband Rodger after the 2011 birth of their son, a Bentley given to reality TV star Peggy Tanous of The Real Housewives of Orange County by her husband Micah after the 2007 birth of their daughter, and a diamond and sapphire necklace given to singer Mariah Carey by her husband Nick after the 2011 birth of their twins.^[5][6][7]

The trend has generated a backlash, as some couples dislike the implicit materialism of push presents, and would prefer increased help in chores or baby care, or save the money for the child's education.^[1]

According to etiquette expert Pamela Holland, there are no set guidelines for push presents. "The standard is that there is no standard," she said. "It does make sense to have etiquette around wedding or baby shower gifts because you're inviting other people into it. But this is far too intimate to have a rule."^[3] In general it is the woman who lets her man know about push presents, not the other way around,^[1] although there can be peer pressure from friends to buy one on either the man or the woman.^[3]

GIFT FOR THE NEW BIG BROTHER

Wow my new friends on Baby Centre are the coolest! Best post because I didn't think of this. Corbynne's life is going to be changed forever and he doesn't know what to expect. I am going to get him a gift from the baby for when the baby is here.

RELIEF

I saw my GP today and I got a referral letter. Just waiting for my authorization code and then I can go see Dr de Bruijn and deliver a Netcare Kuilsriver. Apparently if you choose Netcare then you get a 3d scan, will see if that is true. Krayons sent me baby wash and aqueous cream via RTT delivery, smells heavenly. Cant wait to try it on baby. Bio Oil contacted me and they are sending me a few samples within the next two weeks. Something funny I read today on the internet while watching KNOCKED UP:

 

Third Trimester: I wish I had known ...
"To have a bag packed about two months ahead of time. I went in early and my husband ran home to get some stuff for me. He brought me thong underwear!" — Devan

 

Labour: I wish I had known ..."Not to be embarrassed about anything that happens in the labor room. I pooped on the floor because of my horrible back labor, but not one nurse even blinked an eye. God bless them!" — Stacy

DRS AND MEDICAL AIDS

I have not been this furious in a long time. So here I am ready to go book my gynea and meet the person that is going to be in my personal space for a while. Discovery told me Dr Snoek is the KeyCare network Gynae that I need to go to. Guess what!!! Dr Snoek retired! So how can Discovery not know that? So I settle for 1 of the replacements, guess what! Another surprise! They are on the KeyCare network but I have to make a co-payment of R2500! What the hell is this all about? This receptionist makes me hold forever and all my cellphone is telling me is "1 minute remaining" and she's talking to the other receptionist asking about the circles in the diary and if that appointment is still open or not. How about stop drawing circles and help me before my phone cuts. Guess hat! another surprise.... they are fully booked (all 3 doctors) and I can only be helped in 2 weeks. 7 March. I give up. I made a booking with Dr Hamman, I am rather going to ask him for advice. I need the code to get authorization for my hospital stay and I need to have the re-assurance of knowing who's going to help me deliver because I am freaking out!

BEING MOM

BEING MOM

Our Services For Pregnancy

 
The Pregnancy Pack

Falling pregnant is probably the biggest life changing event anyone can ever go through.  Finding what is best for you and your unborn baby can be a long and arduous process.  We try and make tat journey a little easier by getting you a pack of FREE samples.  These are available from your gynaecologists rooms, just ask the receptionist for your free bag!



Pregnancy Guide

The Pregnancy Guide is an informative publication for mothers-to-be, detailing events right from conception through to important information about childbirth and breastfeeding. It is available in South Africa FREE from most private Gynaecologists and Obstetricians. If your doctor is not participating, you can receive the publication direct from Being Mom. The Guide is normaly contained within a pack of useful samples for this stage of your life.

Our Services At Birth

FREE New Mother Gift Pack

Since 1974 we have been supplying free new mother gift packs to South African mothers. This is a free service to provide new mothers with the opportunity of trying out a range of products, as well as allowing marketers to talk directly to you at the most appropriate time. The gift packs are available throughout South Africa at clinics and hospitals with maternity units. If it is not handed to you, be sure to request your gift pack before you leave the hospital. Normally you will be handed the pack by a Bounty Distributor or the nursing staff at the hospital shortly after the birth of your baby.

 

BabyCare Guide

The BabyCare Guide takes new mothers through caring for themselves and their new babies from childbirth to 12 months old and beyond. Produced in as many as 14 different countries, the BabyCare Guide is the world's most widely referred-to baby care reference publication. Being Mom offers this FREE publication specially edited for the South African mother inside its New Mother Gift Pack

SOUTH AFRICAN FAMILY LAW

So my friend has been struggling with maintenance for he daughter and I thought to myself how little we know about family law. So here's a few facts:

 

MAINTENANCE - FAQ

(NB: for ease of reference the person claiming maintenance is the “plaintiff” and the person against whom maintenance may be claimed is called the “defendant”. Maintenance Officer is “MO”.)

INTRODUCTION Maintenance matters are heard in Maintenance Courts, presided over by a maintenance officer. Maintenance courts are located at every magistrate's courts. They may be approached when maintenance is sought from a person who is legally liable towards a minor child (Form A) must be completed, or for the discharge or substitution of existing maintenance orders. (Form B) must be completed.

The Maintenace Officer may make a maintenance order compelling the defendant to pay maintenance in a particular form and manner. He may also order the defendant to pay arrears from date of birth as well as costs of birth.

The Maintenace Officer may make specific orders such as compelling the defendant to add his child as a dependent on his medical aid scheme.

He may also attach annuities, provident funds and similar for maintenance, but this is restricted to cases where defendant has acted in bad faith. He may also order an emolument attachment order.

When variation of existing order is sought, the defendant must show “good cause” - basically changed circumstances of the minor child, or the parents, that would justify a higher or lower amount.

---

THE HEARING
Defendant does not arrive

Should Defendant not arrive but has consented in writing to the judgement (Form G) an order may be made. An order may be made against an absent Defendant if he consents in writing to judgement.

Should defendant fail to attend, and he does not consent to judgement in writing and Maintenace Officer is satisfied that he had knowledge of the proceedings, he may allow plaintiff to adduce evidence and make an order as he sees fit, including default judgement.

It should be noted that failure to attend where he does not consent to default judgement is a criminal offence.

Steps defendant may take: If default judgment is obtained, the defendant may apply to court for rescission or variation of judgment. (Form I) must be completed and Application must be made within 20 days of defendant becoming aware of judgement or later on good cause shown.

---

PATERNITY

If paternity is disputed, the court may order a paternity test. If paternity is disputed and both parties agree to a test, but cannot afford it, the court has discretion to order state to pay part or all of the cost of the test.

---

APPEALS

Either party may appeal against an order of the maintenance court. However, the lodging of an appeal does not suspend payment of maintenance and that whoever lodges will have to bear the cost. As appeals are made to the High Court this can be very expensive.

One cannot appeal against judgement by consent or default judgements.

An appeal must be lodged within 20 days, setting out what is being appealed and the grounds of appeal.

---

ENFORCEMENT OF MAINTENACE ORDERS

Maintenance Orders can be enforced through attachment of property, emoluments attachment order or the attachment of any debt.

Interest is payable on arrear maintenance.

Action may be taken once at least 10 days have passed after due date of maintenance payment.

To authorise above remedies plaintiff must complete (Form K), attach a copy of maintenance order and accompanied by a statement under oath (Form Q) stating that defendant has failed to meet his maintenance obligations.

If a defendant wishes to set aside an attachment order he must complete (Form M). If he can satisfy court at an enquiry that he has met his obligations, the attachment order will be rescinded.

Court will consider his ability to pay, provided it is not self-created, such as avoiding maintenance by not working, the needs of the child, and defendants conduct to date as well as any other relevant factors.

A warrant of execution may be suspended and replaced with an emolument attachment order is granted, the employer will become liable for maintenance and non-payment of maintenance would then be pursued against the employer for as long as defendant is in his employ.

Such an order may be rescinded, amended on good cause. Application for rescission, amendment or suspension is made after giving notice to other party on (Form N).

A warrant of execution may be suspended and replaced with an attachment of debt owing to the defendant.

(Form P) must be completed for rescission, amendment or suspension of such an order.

---

PENALTIES

A claim of inability to pay will not succeed if due to defendant's unwillingness to work.

Failure to pay maintenance is a criminal offence which carries the possibility of a year in prison with or without the possibility of a fine.

The defaulters details may also be referred to credit bureaux.

---

WHERE DEFENDANT IS RESIDENT IN FOREIGN STATE

If one of the parties is in a foreign state, refer to act 80 of 1963

Getting a Maintenance Order:

Steps to Follow:

* Apply for maintenance at the magistrate's court in the district where you live.
* If you are in doubt, your local court will tell you at which court to apply for maintenance.
* Go to the relevant court and complete and submit Form A: "Application for a maintenance order."
* In addition to the completed form, submit proof of your monthly income and expenses, such as receipts for food purchases, electricity and/or rent bill payments.
* The court will serve a summons (a letter instructing a person to come to court) on the respondent (the person against whom the claim is brought ) to appear in court on a specific date to discuss the matter.
* The respondent agrees to pay the maintenance as claimed, a magistrate will review the relevant documentation. He or she will then make an order, and may decide to do so without requiring the parties to appear in court.
* If the person who is allegedly liable to pay maintenance does not consent to the issuance of an order, he or she must appear in court, where evidence from both parties and their witnesses will be heard.
* If the court finds the person liable for paying maintenance, payments must be made.
* The court can order maintenance money to be paid in one of the following ways:

+ At the local magistrate's office or any other government office designated for this purpose.
+ Into the bank or building society account designated by the person concerned.
+ Directly to the person who is entitled to the money.
+ By means of an order that directs the employer of the person who is liable for paying maintenance to deduct the maintenance payment directly from the employee's salary, in accordance with the new Maintenance Act, 1998.

For more information contact the maintenance officer at your local Magistrates' Court.
Source: Department of Justice & Constitutional Development.

Unmarried? Know your rights

 It’s important to know where you and your baby’s father stand with SA’s Children’s Act, especially if you’re not married. You both have certain rights and obligations, and familiarising yourself with the basics could save you a great deal of trouble

 

 

On 1 July 2007, the new Children’s Act No. 38 of 2005 came into effect.

The point of the new Children’s Act is to improve and define the rights of children in line with our country’s Constitution. Part of what this legislation aims to do, is to define parental responsibilities and rights. 

When the legislation was being drafted, experts used as their framework something called “The Best Interests of the Child Standard.” This means that in all matters concerning the care, protection and wellbeing of a child, the child’s best interests is of paramount importance – more so than the rights of the parent.

In a nutshell

1. A child, male or female, becomes a major upon reaching 18.
2. The biological mother of a child has full parental responsibility of the child, whether she’s married or unmarried.
3. The biological father of a child has full parental responsibility of the child if he’s married to the child’s mother or if he was married to the child’s mother at the time of the child’s conception, birth or any time between the child’s conception and birth.
4. An unmarried biological father may ask a court of law to grant him full parental responsibilities if he:

• at the time of the child’s birth, is living with the mother in a permanent life partnership, or
• consents to be identified as the child’s father, or
• successfully applies to be identified as the child’s father, or
• pays damages in terms of Customary Law, or
• contributes or has tried to contribute to the child’s maintenance and upbringing for a reasonable period.

What does this mean?

It doesn’t matter whether the parents are married and they conceive a child, or, whether they marry after conception and before the birth of a child: they’re both equally responsible for that child. Nothing has changed as regards the law concerning minor children.

Full parental responsibilities and rights

In legal terms, what does the phrase “full parental responsibilities and rights” actually mean and include?

1. The responsibility and right to care for the child;
2. To maintain contact with the child;
3. To act as guardian of the child;
4. To contribute to the maintenance of the child.

Fathers have more rights now

There are various other matters which a parent or guardian would have to administer, safeguard and consent to for the child.
Under the old dispensation, where parties were divorced, one parent (usually the mother) would usually be awarded custody of a minor child and the other parent (usually the father) would be entitled to visitation rights.
The custodian parent would be vested with making all of the day-to-day decisions of the minor child including which school the child would attend, what religion the child would practice, where the child would reside and so on.
This is now no longer the case.
The parents now have joint parental responsibilities and rights, and all major decisions relating to the minor child need to be taken by the parties jointly, which is a far healthier situation for the child.

And if my child is illegitimate?

When a child’s parents are not married, the mother remains the primary caregiver of the child and the father can apply for rights if he complies with one of the requirements mentioned above. Again, the natural father of a child born of unmarried parents still has to pay maintenance for a child under 18 years if age, whether he wants to or not.

What if the father won’t pay?

Importantly, the biological father is responsible for the payment of maintenance for the child, regardless of whether he chooses to apply for parental responsibility or not. If there is a dispute between the child’s parents about maintenance, the matter has to be dealt with by a family attorney, social worker, social services professional or other suitably qualified person.
This applies regardless of whether the child was born before or after the commencement of the new Act.
Some women find themselves in situations where they are involved in relationships, fall pregnant out of wedlock and then discover that their partners want nothing to do with them. They choose to have the child, and their partners attempt to avoid responsibility.
In situations like these, the mother is entitled to approach the maintenance court for the area she lives in to claim maintenance from the father of the child. The court will make an order for an appropriate amount. There are people at the court to assist the mother in completing the necessary documentation and serving the papers on the father to appear at court.
Once an order has been made for the payment of such maintenance, and the father fails to pay the maintenance, he could be sent to prison for failing to do so. When the father of an illegitimate or even a legitimate child is unable to pay maintenance for a child, the court may look to the grandparents of the minor child on the father’s side, to decide whether they are capable of paying maintenance for that child.
So let’s say there’s a situation where, for example, the father of a minor child is killed in an accident, and there are paternal grandparents who are financially able, the mother could ask the court to get the grandparents to give a good reason why they should not be ordered to pay maintenance for the minor child.

Do you have a cohabitation contract?

It is extremely important for women to know their rights. Not just in relation to children, but in relation to their rights generally.
For example, did you know that in South Africa there is no law governing cohabitation relationships? Therefore, in a situation where a couple who may have lived together for many years, when that relationship ends, there are no “common-law husband or wife” rights, as such.
Even if you lived in your boyfriend’s house for 15 years, and have several children together, if that relationship suddenly ends, you might find yourself without a home, unless there’s a contract in place.
You can approach any legal aid clinic or lawyer to help you draw up a simple document that gives you the same rights as a married woman, even if you’re not married. Do it for your peace of mind, and your children’s security.

Adam and Steve?

In South Africa, recently, in terms of the Civil Union Act which became effective on 1 December 2006, same-sex marriages are legally recognised. The laws that apply to children in heterosexual marriages also apply to children in same-sex marriages.
In a recent decision in South African courts, the Department of Home Affairs was ordered to register both parents in a same-sex marriage as the parents of a minor child, to enable a divorce to proceed and to ensure that the parental responsibilities and rights could be properly regulated.

Whose surname does the baby get?

If a child is born out of wedlock, the child will take the mother’s surname, unless the father of the child consents to having his surname being registered on the birth certificate.
If the parties are living together in a marriage-like relationship, then the parents may wish for the child to have the father’s surname.
However, if there is no such relationship then it would make sense for the child to have the mother’s surname to avoid confusion. It’s an entirely personal decision. If you gave your child the father’s surname, then later came to regret it and wished to change the child’s surname, you need the father’s permission, or the Department of Home Affairs will refuse.

You need permission to go overseas with the kids

When a child born in wedlock is taken out of the country, in the company of only one parent, it is necessary to have the written consent of the parent who stays behind. This becomes especially important in divorce cases, where the spouse who remains behind in South Africa may be concerned that the spouse who is travelling might be trying to kidnap the child.
If the child is born out of wedlock it depends on whether or not the father of the child has parental responsibilities and rights and, if so, then his written consent will also be required.

A will is extremely important

If you have children, the issues in a will which need to be dealt with are:

• Who should be their guardians?
• Who will be responsible for their education?
• Who will be responsible for managing your financial affairs?
• It is important to decide who to appoint as Trustees.
• It is important to appoint as your Executor and Trustees people whom you know personally and not, for example, huge financial institutions.
• If you die without a Will, then your Estate will be wound up as an intestate Estate and a person whom you do not know may be appointed to manage your affairs.

Outdated terminology

Courts used to use words like “custody” and “access” when they referred to children’s rights. The terms which are now used are “care” and “contact.”
A parent is now no longer a “custodian” but may provide the “primary place of residence” for a minor child, and have the “care” of the child.

Free legal resources

Whether you want to draw up a cohabitation contract or a will, want to know what your rights as a father are, or need help to receive maintenance from your children's biological father, you don't need to hire an expensive legal adviser. Contact any of these free organisations:

Women’s Legal Centre:

www.wlce.co.za (021) 4211 380

Family Law Clinic:

www.familylawclinic.org.za

Legal Aid:

www.legal-aid.co.za

Lawyers for Human Rights:

www.lhr.org.za

Legal Aid Clinics, nationwide:

• University of Cape Town: (021) 650 3551
• University of Durban-Westville: (031) 204 4445/4821
• University of Fort Hare: (04060) 22236
• University of the Orange Free State: (051) 401 2451
• University of Natal (Durban): (031) 260 2867
• University of Natal (Pietermaritzburg): (033) 260 5778
• University of the North: (015) 268 2903
• University of the North West: (018) 389 2510
• University of Port Elizabeth: (041) 504 2190
• Potchefstroom University: (018) 299 1950
• University of Pretoria: (012) 420 4158
• Rand Afrikaans University: (011) 489 2141
• Rhodes University: (046) 603 8427
• University of South Africa: (012) 429 8439
• University of Stellenbosch: (021) 808 3195/2
• University of Venda: (015) 962 8217
• Vista University (Bloemfontein Campus): (051) 505 1386
• University of the Western Cape: (021) 959 2756; www.communitylawcentre.org.za
• University of the Witwatersrand: (011) 717 8562
• University of Zululand: (035) 902-6192 or 793 3911

DISCHEM BABY CLUB

Hey, talking about BAGS - do you belong to the DISCHEM BABY CLUB? If you register your pregnancy with them you get an awesome baby bag filled with samples, brochures and goodies in your 3rd trimester
http://www.dischem.co.za/content.asp?MenuID=6

FREE SAMPLES UPDATE

Hey fellow South African Readers!
Here are successful companies I have gotten a reply from when it comes to free samples:

• Lil-lets
• Dove
• Huggies
• Revlon

Boyfriend told me yesterday that my cheapness seems to work but I think I am clever not cheap. I have received the following products so far:

• Lil-lets tampons
• Lil-lets pads
• Dove baby cotton wool clouds
• Dove baby ear buds
• Krayons baby wash
• Krayons baby moisturizer
• Bio oil
• Happy events cream
• Huggies nappies samples
• R50 Colgate Palmolive vouchers
• Revlon dye
• Revlon Flex shampoo
• Revlon Flex conditioner
• Revlon base
• Revlon Pink happiness spray
• Mom2be shakes
• R10 off mom2be coupon
• Hugo

ON MY TO-DO LIST: MAKE A TO-DO LIST

Here we go, I am approaching my third trimester and I'm thinking it MIGHT be time to pull my finger out my laptop and actually doing something constructive. Other momma's might actually feel the same. Like for example hospital is a huge stress which I completely block out. With my son I went to a Government Hospital (Karl Bremer, Western Cape) and as all South African momma's know there you don't do much. You go to your antenatal, stand in long queues with your picnic basket because you know you will be there the whole day. The day of your delivery you wait until the last second and you pop your baby out for free and lie about your baby pooping so you can get out of that filth with your family. Now I provided myself some medical insurance and this baby #2 is being born in a beautiful hospital where things need to be planned and you get all kinds of services and freebies (YAY FOR ME). Why am I not indulging in this moment? To get to the point, I need to go see my gynecologist (Dr Snoek LOL - too funny) and I need to get an ICD code from him and contact my medical aid and then provide it to the hospital. Luckily for me I contacted my medical aid to hear what benefits I get with Discovery KeyCare Plus. Huggies contacted me back saying they are sending me a sample of the Huggies New Baby size 1 and 2 and Dry Comfort size 2. Dove is sending me a pack each of Dove Cotton Clouds and BabyWands and lil-lets pads and tampons.

 

VACCINATIONS

So I was on my usual forum indulging in my strawberry yogurt looking through June's angel babies and what our June mommies have to say. I read that there are women that are getting vaccinations. I am aware that healthcare overseas is different to the healthcare we have here in South Africa. I was wondering what vaccinations we have here for adults except for the flu-shot. I googled it and all it shows is all the vaccinations for babies and kids up until age 5.

Routine immunization schedule in South Africa

• At birth (OPV, BCG)
• 6 weeks (OPV, DTP, HBV, Hib)
• 10 weeks (OPV, DTP, HBV, Hib)
• 14 weeks (OPV, DTP, HBV, Hib)
• 9 months (Measles)
• 18 months (OPV, DTP, Measles)
• 5 years (OPV, DT)

BCG = bacillus Calmette-Guérin (tuberculosis) vaccine primarily preventing TB meningitis in infants
OPV = oral polio vaccine
DTP = diphtheria, tetanus, pertussis (whooping cough) vaccine
DT = diphtheria, tetanus vaccine
HBV = hepatitis B vaccine
Hib = Haemophilus influenza group b (meningitis) vaccine

General information about vaccines

How effective are vaccines?

Most of the vaccines in use against viruses are very effective at preventing disease. However, for a variety of reasons, they can fail:

• The vaccine becomes inactive due to incorrect storage, if used past its expiry date, or if incorrectly administered.
• Individuals unpredictably fail to produce an adequate immune response to the vaccine.
• Vaccine immunity “fades” over time.

Overall, about one in 20 people will contract an infection that they were vaccinated against. Usually, such people will get a milder infection than they would have otherwise.

Vaccine reactions

Reactions can occur after vaccinations. The following are the general types of reactions that may occur:

Mild reactions:

• Mildly elevated temperature
• Headache
• Feeling unwell
• Soreness at vaccination site

Severe reactions:

(Rare, but more often associated with pertussis and influenza vaccines.)
These reactions occur within 48 - 72 hours of vaccination and include:

• Extensive, hard, red swelling around the vaccination site
• Fever above 39.5 degrees Celsius
• Convulsions (Pertussis)
• Decreased level of consciousness (Pertussis)
• Prolonged inconsolable screaming (Pertussis)

Anaphylactic (allergic) reactions:

Very rare. Anaphylactic reactions occur within a few minutes to a few hours after vaccination. Similar reactions may also occur after other kinds of drug injections. Anaphylactic reactions are a medical emergency. An anaphylactic reaction may have any of the following symptoms:

• Sudden collapse, with a weak pulse and loss of consciousness (must be distinguished from a faint, which is more common)
• A more gradual onset, with sweating, swelling of the skin (hives), difficulty breathing, swelling of the throat, hoarseness, wheezing, dizziness, fast pulse, paleness

A register of all known side effects with viral vaccines is maintained in the USA and in most European countries. This allows the analysis and follow up of all side effects associated with vaccinations in these countries. Based on data from this register, vaccines are generally regarded as very safe when compared to other medicines.

Risks attached to specific vaccines are mentioned under the descriptions of these in the following section.